Shots of Serenity Episode 46

[00:00:00] Jasmine St John: Hello, my loves and welcome back to another episode of Shots of Serenity with your host, Jasmine St John. Y'all know I'm happy, right? Y'all know, I'm so happy to have this conversation with you guys. I'm happy to have all conversations with you guys. But to be honest, I have not like popped out the microphone and just me and my walls and this microphone.

[00:00:29] Jasmine St John: And you guys, hypothetically in maybe about two months, two months, one, because we just had a wonderful, amazing series that probably lasted about a month, a little bit over a month. And then prior to that, I probably didn't record until like three weeks before that. Any who I'm so glad to get back, having a conversation with you guys.

[00:00:58] Jasmine St John: I want to thank all my guests for that wonderful series. So thankful as you guys know it was very impromptu, but it was amazing. I got to meet new people. I got to be enlightened and it was just a wonderful thing. I was able to show gratitude towards all wonderful black businesses.

[00:01:19] Jasmine St John: So, that was really, really good. So I hope you guys are doing well. I hope all is well, I hope you guys were entertained by the series. I hope you guys really liked it, you know, per usual, anything that I can do better questions, comments, concerns, please DM us at shotsofserenity_ or email me at shotsofserenity@gmail.com.

[00:01:44] Jasmine St John: So very quick updates. I'm back in school, I've actually been back in school for about three weeks now. I am a second year mental health counselor. Like I remember being here a couple of days ago, at least last year, super excited. Like literally I have one more semester after this and then I graduate.

[00:02:04] Jasmine St John: We can talk about those, the thoughts, the aspirations, but that's for another time. I have internships that have been great. I have like clients, I actually talk to clients that has been amazing. I really have just been feeling full, full of love, full of divinity, full of gratitude. Just full of love as you guys know , I finally have returned back home or returned back to my body and my being, I would say like on a spiritual journey, but we're all on a spiritual journey. I guess I just got reminded of that. So that has been great. My morning routine, I've been doing yoga every morning since summer.

[00:02:45] Jasmine St John: Really just being intentional about who I am. Exploring my ancestry, being more conscious, just all the things that we can get to little by little through every episode. So I think I want to start a thing where we start doing something that brings us towards awareness. So today we're going to do a body scan.

[00:03:07] Jasmine St John: I know, and I listened to a lot of other podcasts, which also just been literally filling my brain with like fricking knowledge. It's been so amazing, especially because my younger self used to well my younger self was always an inquirer, like I would love to inquire about stuff. People tell me stuff I'm like, but why?

[00:03:28] Jasmine St John: Like how and da-da-da and I lost myself. I got lazy life happen, I really became a person like, eh, I don't feel like looking this up and in this journey I got back into my, I want to know more bag to a point where I was a little, nah, I was going to say it's a little like unhealthy, but it isn't like, yeah, I've been reading books.

[00:03:52] Jasmine St John: Okay. We can go into this at another time. I don't want to, you know, talk to you guys for 20 minutes of an update. But yeah, it's just been filled with gratitude and love. So today we'll do a quick body scan. I said, I talk, I brought a podcast because I was going to say a lot of wonderful podcasts they had like meditation, like at some point, some of them.

[00:04:15] Jasmine St John: And I say that to say, cause today I actually had that experience I was listening to, I should really say it. I did not tell you guys, I got a counselor. I found this podcast from my counselor. I'll dip more into that next week. So again, I won't keep talking about updates as I'm still talking about updates anyways.

[00:04:31] Jasmine St John: I wanted to do something that can still kind of be done in the midst of things. I know it won't always be like that. Other times it would be meditation where you have to be still, where you have to be in a quiet place. But I say that all to say, I want to do a quick body scan. I think this body scan can be done, and okay I brought that up because a lot of times I listen to podcasts while I'm at work and it's hard. I can't just close my eyes and just go away. I mean, I can it would probably affect my productivity, but I can't. So I sent it to say, this body scan should be able to be done anywhere. So if you can have a seat, maybe stand up.

[00:05:11] Jasmine St John: If you can close your eyes, feel free to keep your eyes open, whatever you can do in this moment, whatever your body feels called to do in this moment. So first want to just take a breath.

[00:05:30] Jasmine St John: So I want you guys to start from the top of your head. Any thoughts that may be going on ruminating, allow them to go gracefully, start bringing awareness towards your mouth. Allow any space, grant some space between your teeth, your jaws, your lips. Bring some awareness towards your back. If your back is stiff, allow it to roll down your back.

[00:06:01] Jasmine St John: Allow your shoulders to roll down your back and relax. If there's any tension in your hands. If your hands are tight, if your hands are twisted and slowly release them, allow them to be released. Allow them to flow down your body.

[00:06:22] Jasmine St John: Bring awareness towards your abdomen. See if there's anything that you're holding in that area gracefully release it, pay attention to the way your abdomen expands and contracts. When you inhale and exhale. Continue to scan down throughout your body. Be mindful of any tension in your hips and your thighs and your knees and your calves.

[00:06:56] Jasmine St John: Let them go release them. They are not yours. Then let's bring awareness towards your feet, the basis of your feet. Let them go. Remind yourself that the basis of your feet are to be grounded. The basis of your feet are allowed to stand firm and to who you are. Finally just take another breath, inhale through your nose and release any tension out through your mouth.

[00:07:33] Jasmine St John: Alrighty guys. I hope you were able to do that. I hope you're able to do that in a safe, quiet space and whatever space that you were in. I hope that you were allowed to release any toxins that you were allowed to release any tension. Anything that's been festering within those body parts. So I wanted to do that just to kind of, you know, ground yourself.

[00:08:02] Jasmine St John: We love grounding ourselves over here. So you are going to hear my intro next. So be prepared for that. Cause I know it is, we're chill zone right now and it's very upbeat. So just mentally prepare for the fact that you will hear my intro after this and I'll be back after the intro.

[00:08:22] Jasmine St John: Hello, my loves and welcome to Shots of Serenity, where you can find dope conversations and a peace of mind. This podcast is not meant to be a replacement for counseling or psychotherapy. I encourage each and every one of you to seek out a licensed helping professional, as you see fit. This podcast was established as a safe space to continue the conversation of mental health and all of its manifestations. Now let's get into it!

[00:08:57] Jasmine St John: Alrighty, my loves. So as you guys see from the topic we're going to double back a little bit to boundaries, but this time with compassion. So if you're an OG you know, that we discuss boundaries and I think it's episode six. So please refer back to that, if you missed it. I do think that's a nice foundation for this conversation.

[00:09:23] Jasmine St John: We talked about the importance of boundaries. Boundaries are used to set a foundation for how we should treat ourselves and how we want others to treat us. But today we're going to talk about, can I have compassion and set boundaries? Can I be compassionate and still take no shit? So that's what I want to talk about and all episodes, you know, it's just very foundational to bring awareness in your life to see if you are partaking in any of these things, whether them, whether they be, you know, really great healthy things or things that are a little challenging in our lives.

[00:10:00] Jasmine St John: So I want to give a disclaimer, always disclaimers. I deeply believe in duality. I do believe that two things can exist at once. I believe in spectrums. I don't think that anything's too far left and too far right. So anything that I talk about, I'm going to always give those disclaimers just in case that anyone is new listening and this is the first episode that they're listening. So with that being said, I believe that although it is an inherent necessity to put ourselves first, because know, I advocate for self-love. I always advocate for self care. I'll advocate for self exploration. Yeah, like it starts with us. So keep that in mind.

[00:10:43] Jasmine St John: I also do believe that we are all one. Our purpose is to spread love, knowledge and grace while building community, community is important. We have these gifts for reasons. We have these voices for a reason to share them with others in a very healthy and conducive way, but you cannot build solid non-judgemental open arms communities without learning yourself first.

[00:11:09] Jasmine St John: So, all of these things are important. So with that being said, let's go ahead and go back to what we were talking about. I of course, want to provide definitions for those that may be too logical of beings. You know, essentially some of these concepts I went to school for, I have the definition, the Westernized, logical mindset towards it.

[00:11:31] Jasmine St John: But I do believe, you know, in life we are a little too logical in the sense where we feel like everything just has to be so black and white, it needs concrete definition and not just grounding ourselves, but how we feel. What's our intentions? What is our intuition saying? So for those that need definitions and definitions are important, you know, boundaries, I mean, duality definitions are important.

[00:11:57] Jasmine St John: So I say that to say the concepts we're going to be talking about it's boundaries, not so much of that definition because you can refer to episode six for that. I don't want to make this like a repetition episode, but we're going to talk about compassion. Compassion is to feel with, it's a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another person who is striked by misfortune.

[00:12:22] Jasmine St John: We're also going to talk about boundlessness. So boundless means having no bonds, infinite or vast unlimited. So the question is how do these two interact? So how can you be compassionate, boundless, and still have boundaries, right? Like how can you be compassionate and still take no shit because a lot of us talk about there's a popular phenomenon of a healing journey, or I'm a healer and it makes it can be perceived like you just have to be this perfect person, this person that gets walked over this person that can't have fun and be their true self.

[00:13:08] Jasmine St John: All of those is the exact opposite of that. Spirituality embraces who you are right here, right now. And it also embraces allowing things in your life that are conducive and helpful and staying away from things that aren't helpful, that aren't conducive. So that's what we're talking about today. Why it's important to have compassion yet and be boundless and have boundaries is the fact that we all have stories and we all have traumas.

[00:13:40] Jasmine St John: I know that you guys heard of the saying hurt people, hurt people. It's very easy to give people back that same energy they give you in situational events. But with these concepts being compassionate allows you to take back, sit back, excuse me, and think, okay. This is not about me. This person have a lot of crap going on.

[00:14:07] Jasmine St John: We all do and because of their experiences, because of the way that they see the world, they projected that onto me. I'm going to choose not to take it. A lot of times they're reflections of how, they actually see themselves, how they view other people in their lives and most of the time it has nothing to do with us.

[00:14:30] Jasmine St John: Like I, the first thing that came in my head is when we were younger and you may have had like bullies, hopefully not, but you know, it's the reality that in grade school, some people get bullied. Some of us get bullied, some don't. A lot of times, like if a kid's like, oh you're fat, da-da-da and they're the person that is insecure about themselves.

[00:14:49] Jasmine St John: They're the ones that don't love themselves. But instead they project that, that lack of love, they project that low self-esteem on to us. And we can either choose to be like, well, that's a reflection that you obviously feel about yourself, so I'm not going to take that on. Right. That's how, that's how we, that's, that's a healthy way of going throughout life.

[00:15:11] Jasmine St John: That's a way of going throughout life where you're not taking on other people's baggage, but sometimes we take it on and it's like, well, dang, am I fat. Am I like, do I feel insecure? Then you think about it, and then from then on the next action may be like, you know what? Because this person made me feel this way.

[00:15:33] Jasmine St John: I'm going to pick on someone else a little bit smaller, and that's how the cycle continues. The phrase of hurt people, hurt people continue. It's important to remember that everyone is battling something. Everybody has gone through traumas. Everybody has gone through tribulations. Your compassion may be healing.

[00:15:55] Jasmine St John: It may be transformative to that person. That's really, really nasty, but instead you kill them with kindness instead, you don't stoop to their level and it may even allow them to step back and be like, hmm, I may have been very wrong or they may not. That leads us into our next point as to why all these three things can exist now for a while.

[00:16:20] Jasmine St John: I'm like, why am I being on nice and da-da-da? It's making me seem like I'm the weak person and they're still being nasty. But another thing to think about is karma's a real thing, you know, that compassion that you extended on to someone else that may have not returned it back to you. You will get your good karma back, whether that be direct or indirect.

[00:16:43] Jasmine St John: So direct as in okay. They may apologize. They may, and now all of these things can be in various situations, whether this be a stranger, whether this be someone in your life, whether this be people that you work with, whether this be relationships within your life, just in general, we're all family, we're all in community.

[00:17:05] Jasmine St John: So yeah, when it comes to good, when it comes to good karma, it can be direct and indirect. So, the direct aspect is you directly getting that back or indirect that good karma, may come to your kids. It may go on to your parents. It may go on to your cars, like generations to come and although it would be great to get that back, it's also amazing.

[00:17:29] Jasmine St John: It's also fruitful. It's also appreciative when people and other people in our lives are blessed as well, just from us doing the right thing. With that being said, it's so easy to just be like, oh, there's no good in the world. So why do, why do I have to be nice? Like, why do I have to be the quote, unquote pushover, but how have you contributed to it from that first thought about how hurt people hurt people? Where do you break the cycle? Where do you break the continuation of trauma of hurting other people? The continuation of being nasty to other people. Where are you providing your good energy? Where are you providing your healing energy?

[00:18:13] Jasmine St John: Where are you allowing room for transformation in someone else's life or transformation within this world? And again, no judgment, all of these things that we talk about here and no judgment, but more so for us to just reflect really, just to bring awareness, just to have perspective on what am I doing to contribute to what we're talking about in this sense, what am I doing to provide compassion? What am I doing to set solid boundaries? Like we talked about in episode six, how can I be boundless in my own self and my own being to continue on my spiritual journey to continue on my healing process. Where am I, what is my stance in this world, in this community?

[00:19:02] Jasmine St John: The last point. I want to bring up about how these concepts interact is. It is self-healing why hold resentment towards someone when you can just let go and heal yourself. Our next episode is actually on forgiveness. So we'll dive in a little bit. We'll dive a little deeper into that. I know it's, it's, it's just so easy to always want to be the baddest in the room.

[00:19:32] Jasmine St John: Always want to be the nastiest. The mean is the perceived strongest, the perceived person that has power when the true power is and letting go. Letting go, we're holding this, so back to the example, we use a little earlier, like if a bully is just mean to you, you hold that resentment towards that person.

[00:19:59] Jasmine St John: Every time you see the person, you're shook, every time you see someone that reminds you of the person, you have an attitude, in all of those things takes energy. All of those things take mental exercises. Like you have to put in work to do these things, as opposed to just letting go and that letting go offers you healing, as opposed to just seeing that.

[00:20:24] Jasmine St John: It has nothing to do to do with you and again, it could seem like, oh, I'm just being, I'm just being a pushover. I'm just being a little girl about a little, little boy about it. No you're being a boss about it. You're being a queen about it. You're being a king about it, by not stooping down to their level and not allowing them access to your energy so much where it does not even phase you because it doesn't serve you.

[00:20:54] Jasmine St John: I really hope all of that, just really brought some awareness to you guys, because like I said, for a while, through my life through feeling hurt, it was so easy for me to just, you know, put on a stank face and feel some type of way, and, you know, meet people in the same way that they meet me.

[00:21:17] Jasmine St John: All that did was, was manifesting my mind and body. All that did was make me feel some type of way. When at heart I don't, I'm smiley. I'm giggly. Like I love, love, like all that. Took me further away from home. I talked about in the beginning, how I've returned home, like deep down inside I'm a loving person. I'm an emotional filled person. Like, and all those things made me everything, but that, and I didn't want to be that person and that's okay. You don't have to be the nasty person that the world sets you out to be. You can be free. You can liberate yourself by not taking on other people's crap.

[00:22:01] Jasmine St John: This is why I also say, if you haven't please refer back to the first episode, because it doesn't mean to continue to put yourself in situations where you're getting stepped on. That doesn't mean to be a doormat. Like the phrase in the beginning, you can have compassion and not take no crap from anyone, you know, duality, but we're not gonna, we're not gonna go there because we went there already .In summary have compassion do not let traumas manifest into the world into your body and what I mean by that is when we have things, when we have resentment, not only is that again, continuous cycle in the world, but it staying in your being. That energy, that manifestation, cause y'all know, you can manifests positive and negative things.

[00:22:52] Jasmine St John: You can manifest healthy and unhealthy things. So don't let that manifest into your body. When it comes up at a time that you're not even thinking about it, you're like, okay, where's this coming from? It's coming from that lack of forgiveness is coming from that lack of letting go of. So do not let traumas manifest into the world, work on it for your own self liberation, not for the person that projected it onto you.

[00:23:21] Jasmine St John: All of this basically hinders you from being your highest self. It hinders you from being the person that you were called to be and despite our differences, despite our different lineage and backgrounds and viewpoints in this world, we all have one thing in common is true peace, true liberation, to be the best version of ourselves, despite who likes it and who doesn't like it.

[00:23:46] Jasmine St John: So, having bounds, having limitations to your compassion and your love for yourself, the world and those around you. It hinders us from being our higher self and I don't know about y'all, but I'm going to be my highest self every day. Okay. I'm assuming that, so do you, because you're here listening to this podcast, so let this episode and every episode give you permission to look within, reflect on what you've been harboring and ask yourself, is it worth my peace? Is it worth my growth? Is it worth me obtaining my higher self? Just to show that I'm the biggest or the baddest in a situation. Just to show or act as if things don't phase me when internally it's eating me up inside.

[00:24:45] Jasmine St John: Can you have compassion and boundaries? Alrighty y'all, I think boundaries or the lack there of is one of my favorite type of topics to talk about. I really love the intersectionality or yeah, the intersectionality between self and how we show up for others and how we interact with others. So I can't promise you that we won't have more content on boundaries and compassion and still being boundless in a selfish way or being, or being boundless in the way that we think and the way that our minds maneuver or the way that our bodies maneuver. But I really wanted to come back in with all of this, from the series with that awareness.

[00:25:36] Jasmine St John: So it is time for the quote of the week. Y'all, I just, in the, in the groove of me learning myself, I love podcasting, okay. I really like it. Like it feels, it feels good. I hope that I am able to connect. I hope that I'm able to extend exchange the energy. I hope that I'm able to bring some awareness and enlightenment into your life. As I think that I am. So yeah, this week's quote is by Robin Williams. Really love him as an actor.

[00:26:12] Jasmine St John: We ironically actually had to do like a case conceptualization where we didn't have to do it on him, but our group chose him. I didn't realize the type of life that he lived, especially through the TV screen, like his roles was just full of light, which he still was, but just understanding the trials and tribulations he went through, which actually is fricking ironic because, you know, we really, like we said, in this episode, we don't really take a second to pause and realize that everyone is really battling life.

[00:26:45] Jasmine St John: Okay, life is not easy out here. Why would I, or you or we, or whatever pronoun you want to put in there want to add more sorrow or make it harder than it already is. So, Robin Williams says, everyone you meet is fighting a battle. You know, nothing about. Be kind, always. It may sound simple. It may sound like duh, but even in just quote unquote little situations, little scenarios, provide yourself, grace provide other people, grace.

[00:27:23] Jasmine St John: It will go a very, very long way. I love you guys so much. I can't wait to do this with you next week we are on episode 40, fricking six. Thank you guys. I'm so proud of myself. My goal for this year was to be consistent every week. I'm popping out an episode and we're almost about to be to our year anniversary, which is November 1st.

[00:27:47] Jasmine St John: I actually have a lot of exciting things for you guys. I'll wait until a little bit closer to disclose what those things are, but I think you guys are going to really love it. I really love it. The reason why I decided to make this podcast is because I've been comfortable and so I wanted to take it up a notch.

[00:28:03] Jasmine St John: So, y'all know, I had to take it up a notch again. On our one anniversary, but I love you guys. I hope you guys have a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful day. Don't forget to follow us on Instagram at shotsofserenity_, I've actually been having a lot of content on there as well. More inspiration, more motivation, more reminders to love yourself, to dedicate some time to yourself.

[00:28:26] Jasmine St John: So if you have not already follow us on Instagram, because we lit over there too, we're not as lit here. Cause y'all get my word vomit here, but yeah. Alright y'all.

[00:28:36] Jasmine St John: Thank you, my loves for taking the time out to listen and join the conversation. I really hope you all enjoyed it. Please don't forget to subscribe and share this podcast. If you've done so already and you like the vibes, be sure to write a review wherever you're listening to Shots of Serenity, it truly helps. Also feel free to email or DM us with any recommendations, questions, or concerns. Our email is shotsofserenity@gmail.com. Our Instagram is shotsofserenity_, and those are all spelled the exact same way it is spelled on our podcast.

[00:29:22] Jasmine St John: I'll see you guys next episode. Thanks again for listening, peace and blessings to you all and your families. I hope we all have an amazing week. Buh bye.

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